Cheaters never Proser....or do they?

Is once a cheater always a Cheater???

This is a day old question with new and old found answers. One of my friends hit me up with this earlier. When I responded ....Everyone agreed!

"A cheater is like a bad plane
...yea it fucked up once but its a high risk to fuck up again"~Fav

I never say once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater but, most often then none that is the case. Some people live an learn. Some people do it out of spite an have their reasons. An some people just don't care about who they hurt an how they hurt them. An some people just mess up! No one is perfect, but putting faith in someone who may not deserve it is tough.

People may say they change, but do they really? It takes a growth to realize your flaws. Even more growth in trying to improve. Theirs so many stigma's that come with relationships, w/o your mate constantly adding to it. Trust an communication is the foundation to anything especially love. An when you doubt someone you'll never be happy. When you trusted someone an they give you reasons to doubt them, theirs nothing far worse. Even if you forgive them, how can you trust they won't let you down again? Everything now is questionable! They've officially ruined your sanity....


You begin wondering why they didn't respond? Is that "JUST" a friend? Was it only once? What was the reason? Can I trust you? Are you worth this? The list goes on and on... It takes a lot walking into a new situation knowing his/her faults? It's hard for someone to want to date you if your known as a damn cheater! lmao I'm just saying... Can you blame them??? Of course you gonna tell me what I want to hear. Of course you've changed...Of Course! Sounds Nice!

But let's say it's not someone new. What if your dating someone an they cheated, but say it won't happen again. Do you forgive? Most people do regardless of what they say. Love makes you forgive an do most things you say you wouldn't! Fact! But it's far sadder when you lose hope in the one you love. You may love them but no longer have a desire for them. What's the point? You can't desire someone roaming the streets. Like they say "fuck is you doing? You Embarrassing us!" I rather not be in Love then to lose Love in trust! It'll drive you nuts. People can learn from the paths they've laid. Just make sure they're ready to create a new way!

LeToya "She Aint Got" from EQ Video on Vimeo.

Have You Ever had Someone.........

Have you ever have someone look at you like you were the prettiest thing God's created?

Like they're heart will shield you from any harm to come your way?

Like the thought of loosing you was inconceivable?

The thought of having you was indescribable an undeniable?

Like he/she wanted to be your Greatest memory?

Like he/she was soo far past, the petty Pride and Mental Immaturity that makes so many people self destruct?!?!

Like they couldn't fathom hurting You!?

Like all the tears you cried before was preparing you to know True joy and how Love is supposed to feel!?

Have You? I think I........

HE Broke her Heart!!!

This entry was inspired by my friends story. He was telling me about the women that was recently storming in his life. He said, "I don't know what it is but its a lot of ex's an old girls." An most of them he wasn't feeling, because they didn't want him back then. Somewhat spiteful, but with genuine reason. Excluding one of his ex's, which he reminisced on. He started off by saying he was young, but 22 is not that young. He told me how she was the first and now seemingly, the only girl he love thus far. How they were great together, an how he did the best he could at that time UNTIL..... Until he met this other pretty girl.

So you know me, with ALL the questions.
Fav: What you do?
Did you cheat?
He quickly said...
"Naw, I ain't cheat I just dumped her."
"I was just getting tired of her all together honestly"

Or soo he thought! He ended up dating the new girl shortly after but wasn't happy. She was pretty and new but it wasn't the fit that he had. He realized he made a HUGE MISTAKE, so he tried to get her back. He told me how he dumped the other girl an was relentless in his attempts to get her back. But she wasn't budging, he claimed. I was like we'll duh! you broke her heart an left her an you think you could just walk back in. That's not how you do the ones you love. Every relationship has its dry moment, when every things just the same, or you argue. But you work through that, because everyone goes through it. That's life, it doesn't mean anythings wrong. he was like

"An your absolutely right, but I was young minded an not thinking." ~Him

I don't know why it takes for some people to lose someone special, for them to learn. You would think that they would appreciate them an be grateful. But most get ahead of themselves, and become greedy and selfish. An always have to learn the hard way.

"A Love unappreciated is a Love Lost!"~ Me

How Do You Know Your Fallin In LOVE?

Everyone was asked this simple question...

"What is one sign that you noticed to let you know you was fallin in love with someone or loved em!" ~Faviola

Lauren London- "girl i never know I just go with the flow until they tell me they like me... I then pay attention to my feelings...if i even have any for them"

Angela (Angie Ange)- "If I can look at u while you're sleeping and not be repulsed Im prolly falling"

Dante' G- "seeing someone all day/all night and not wanting them to leave, love doesnt take breaks Fav lmao"

Shay- "used to come home and just leave all his shit everywhere on the floor! i fuckin hated it! Annoying wasn't the word but you don't really see when your in love i guess"

Chris C- "jus constantly on my mind...experienced the good and bad together and managered to overcome it and her really bein my friend and girl at the same time"

Javar- "u care more about them than u do urself"

Brian B (Monk)- "No matter the situation, how my day was goin (good or especailly bad) they could brighten my day & make me smile. Make me forget my problems or share joy on good days!"

Antonio J- "butterfly's at all times can't stop think of them"

Dee Jay- "when we had to separate from someone an you really ain't want em to leave or once they did you realized how much they mattered to you....ya feel me?"

Eric E- "For me since I am such a private person I would say probably when I feel like I want them to be a part of everything I do"

Marcus C- "when you become emotionally attached to that person"

W Lance- "When we started to think alike and acquired each others mannerisms"

Kenny 'Bud'- "the moment i start putting my views and feelings aside to make sure i'm looking out for there's"

KP- "Cuz I wanna talk to them all the time... I think about them all the time and u just get that feeling that the person is perfect even though u know they're not...u start feeling like a kid again"

Troy- "You find yourself thinking about them throughout the day. You also find things around you that reminds you of him/her"

Dalontee' E- when u think about there every move like if they not with you, thats all you think about when all you wanna do is make them happy

Me- "I knew I was in love then when I couldn't argue wit em face to face cuz I would be pissed (so alot of times I just stayed quite) but soon as we made eye contact we laughed I could neva freakin stay mad an if he hugged me it made it all betta no matter what the issue was."

If He/She goin be SHADY/CHEAT, Then so WILL I!

What comes around, goes around and you reap what you sow!!!

Unless your just a lucky bastard, who gets away with murder every time while making millions an relaxing everyday. But usually paybacks a Mutha F@&k... an Karma's a B$@&! etc...

"Revenge is the sweetest Joy, next to getting Pussy..." ~TuPac

Life says, if you believe in karma, you'll let life naturally take care of those who've wronged. In most cases, that's the complete opposite. Get back is the name of the game, for every tear shed. He cheated, so F' that! So will I. She said what!??! We'll let me tell you about her. Why would ya ol' boo say that if it wasn't true? I don't know, but let me tell YOU! Is an on going circle, as well as a daily occurrence.

My thing is, you are WHO YOU ARE! If your not a good person by now, odds is you'll never be. Can only hope, to get somewhat better. But you'll mostly likely remain an AWFUL person. Everyone knows what's right an what's wrong. An you damn sure know how to treat each other. You know what hurts you, an generally others. You just choose to not give a fuck, or take responsibility. Every time I hear a story from both sex's about get backs on ex's for cheating, I laugh. It's like "She did him, soo yea I sexed so an so" an told my girl afterwards. An had the nerve to say, they felt bad.

Yes, everyone on earth can do whatever they like at anytime. But that's what separates YOU from animals, because you THINK! You have the ability to use logic, an not act on impulse. Unless your just a "WEAK- MINDED" individual. I ask...

"Well if you were just waiting on him/her to cheat or do something fucked up, for you to do the same back..Why were you with him/her if you were just waiting on a Reason to do the same?"

It's funny when you've dated someone, an y'all stop dating. All the things come out, about em. You hear countless stories from girls and guys alike, of how they've acted an what they've done while y'all were close. Or if they did this an this, why don't you do this an that an the third. An yes it maybe disheartening, to hear those things of someone who looked in your eyes an said they cared. Not knowing, how embarrassing their actions were. But that's them, an Not you. That is the way they live, an how they're perceived. Noone can make you be an Asshole, say Mean shyt, Cheat, Lie, Speak Down on others, or be Shady to those who are nothing but exceptional an love you.

I know if the person I love hurts me I would be devastated initially. My first instinct would not be to go have sex w/ some random. That shit won't make me feel better, at the end of the day. Getting fucked twice, hypothetically an literally is too conflicting for me. {I would need a moment! lls} Or people who send revealing notes/phone calls to other women/men exposing them an their character. I personally don't have time for all that. An no matter what he/she did, if you loved/cared for them... Why would you instantly want them to feel the same way? That won't make you any better than them.

An in turn, becoming them won't help either.

Fuck if I want HIM!

Today's topic was brought on by a number of my friends, with penises. Usually this topic is often discussed among my girls, but its cute to here my boys input. Not cute, in the sense that their views hold no weight, but cute as in comical. Its funny how your male friends can give the greatest most soundest advice, about love an what a man should do. But when you scope there internal affairs, you realize they're acting a damn fool themselves. If not, putting some girl through the same thing you've called them for. Its like they just choose not to implement their own suggestions.

But in today's case, the crossroads in a relationship were your either Done or choose to Progress. This is usually a women's internal battle of "I love him" or "Fuck if I want HIM!" When your best friends claim your in denial an expect some relapse, or hoping you'll stick to your guns an chuck up the deuce. Today I was talking to my boy Jay an he said "There's a point you reach the end of the bullshit and your not willing to lose that one you love. Your tired of dating, or meeting new parents" an whatnot. That basically a man will put down his pride for the few great women they're soo rarely allotted in there lifetime. But I'm pretty sure there's been instances were he's gambled a heart an not cared. If he did, does he believe in karma?

My boy Lou said "Fav every girl reaches that point" Jay said "Once she's gotten there, its up to the man to step it up or fall back!" But my question is Why does it have to get to that point when most men know that point exist? Why do women have to say, Fuck it I'm done? Are you really gonna ride the little boy bike till the wheels fall off, then grown up? How can you harbor the conscience of hurting the person care for or love? While knowing, although they forgive they least likely forget. The other day this boy told me he had a good one, an he let her get away. Asked me if I knew her (but I didn't) an he still reflected on it, till this day. I rather give my all, than say what if.

Oh What FUN When You Marry Young!

When you think of "MARRIAGE", you think of just settling down and getting serious. When did getting married, turn into the end of days?!?! That's sooo SAD, especially when it should be the opposite. I think mid 20's are the Perfect time to get married personally. It's semi young an GREAT! Just think about it, the reason why people dread marriage, is because somewhere they were told that's when the joy ends. But on the contraire that's where it really begins. I don't know about you, but my husband is gonna be ecstatic I'm his wife!!! lol

Marrying your bestfriend should be the best day of your life! I'm talking about cutting up an acting a damn fool for the world! I rather marry young.....

Getting married in the your 30's is wack because the imaginations gone. Its all about business, an you wonder why divorce is soo high. You didn't like each other when you got married to begin with, an treated it like a partnership from the start. Your bored, barely talk to each other an eventually stop having sex. Followed by endless years of using your kid(s) as an excuse of staying where your at. Shit, now that's terrible!

But to marry in your mid 20's, is the best of both worlds if you think about it. Cut the B.S an grow up for a minute. It only takes about a year and a half to know, if you want to marry someone. I could never understand the selfishness of making someone wait years upon years for nothing. If your not cheating and you know you love them, its like what the hell your waiting for. Let's get this party started! There's millions of pros for me.....

* You an your spouse can enjoy each other alone w/o rushing to have kids.
* You can travel the world together while your bodies are still HOT!
* You can act a damn fool in public like "Dick an Jane" lol
* You have plenty of time to grow together w/o being stuck in your ways.
* Play house w/ a new piece of lingerie every night.

She's NOT that into You!

So I know "VALENTINE'S DAY" is Saturday, an Love is in the air. But were gonna steer away from all that gushy stuff. Watching the movie "He's Not that into you" made me wonder about the signs that guys don't pick up on.

Clue 1: If she's sweet to you, and you two hang out an don't have SEX.... She's either

*Passing time since her man's away{Army, School, Job Training} with you!
*Having Sex with someone else!
*She's tryna figure out if the one she wants....WANT HER!

Clue 2: If she doesn't call.....She's either

*In a Relationship!
*Didn't want to give you her # to begin with, but didn't want to be the Bitch!
*Was attracted to you, but changed her mind!

Clue 3: If she doesn't....

*Want you to call/text her...
*Want to make plans for the weekend...
*Listen to you when you talk...

{Women who care REALLY pay Attention}

*Mind going THREE days without hearing from you...
*Mind you dating other women after a period of time

SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU!!!!

You see, women are rarely up for any kind of games. We just want Prince charming an to live Happily Ever After. Snow White, ain't never want to hook-up with all seven dwarfs!

Is There Such A Thing as FRIENDS w/ An EX???

So last night (in case you missed it) we're talking about Break-ups! Can ex's truly be platonic friends after a break-up???

At first, I said NO! Now reflecting, I say it depends on who it is an how you parted ways. For instance, if you was just some boy that I liked an talked to for awhile, we can be friends later. It's just because I honestly didn't care much about you, to let my feelings linger. Now if I loved you, I'm talking years with my boo, then HELL NO! This not "FRIENDS" or "Seinfeld". None of that Elaine an Jerry crap, lets be honest. I'm not gonna be talking to you about the new boo, I'm not gonna be talking to you about sex, I'm not gonna be picking up guys around you. You know why??? I still probably love you or care deeply. Yes I will get jealous, be annoyed, an in my feelings. For the mere fact , I'm not gonna pretend it is what its not. I HATE when people try to front like they don't care when they obviously do. It's like, why are you lying to yourself, it's only hurting you.


Alot of males called in an said, No it's not possible. Their reasoning, was that they wanted to have sex with the ex afterward. Horn-dogs! But aside that, they felt like that mental an emotional hold, would make it hard to sincerely move on. Yea you gotta new girl, but whats the point if your still hanging w/ your ex. Still engaging in that emotional aspect, that united you to begin with. Eventually, that would cause some problems with your new counter part. Leading them to sing songs, like Neyo's "Go back to what you know."

Most women chimed in with, the "Waiting to Exhale" method of release. Burn an throw away all his S@%&! lmao Erase the sweetest memories of him, to absorb an reflect why you left. If you see all the cards, letters, gifts, an pictures you never remember the time he cheated or the nights he made you cry. So with him, you have to let all material possessions go as a cleanse. Other women said you had to Hate, Resent, Reflect, Forgive and then you can be Friends. That's the only way to truly have them out your system, as well as TIME!

Honestly, when it comes down to it everyone said it was possible, to some extent. First off everyone said that it really takes years. Remove yourself for at least a year, without contact. Keep it light an cordial depending on there current situation. Don't go stepping on toes!!! If they're with someone, don't go popping up at their house or go out on dinner dates ect.. That time is gone, so let it go so no confusion will arise. An at the end of the day, be honest with yourself! If you still deeply care for this person then extract yourself from the compromising situation. Your just not READY!

Don't forget to TUNE-IN Every Wednesday to www.Elitedcmag.com from 9:30-11pm est.

Things that Steal My Heart!

Hello Everyone! Usually I generalize, when I discuss things. Today's different, because I can't speak for the next woman on this. It's all an insight on me, my heart an, how you can steal it and how to make me smile. There are a lot of men who are so obsessed, with obtaining the physical aspect. That they get the door slammed in their face, before they get a foot in it. Or they'll try to get in my head, but never take the time to see how things operate. I can tell when someone, fakes like he knows me, but really doesn't have a clue. Yea he got the basics, that someone who's known me for a few months know. But they really don't know me!

Things I LOVE!

1. Spontaneous People! It's but soo many times you want to do the same ol' shyt!
2. Out going People! If I have an idea, your at least down to try it and not bash it!
3. Sweetness! It shows multitudes of a Mans character, when he can step out his box to please a women for the hell of it!
4. Someone who remembers all the small things to do!!!
5. Sense of Humor! I love to laugh :)
   

Things I HATE!

• Disrespectful Men! Don't Bark at ME! Curse! ect..
  
• Inconsiderate People ...Think about how others feel!
  
• Late people ...if you give me a time, then Stick to It!
• People who can't keep a promise! All a man has, is his WORD!
• Materialistic People!
  
• Frugal People ...I would give anything for people in my life! Money's not an Issue! When you can drop $100's on yourself, an count cents for everyone else your Selfish!

Faviola....
I Love, love, love All kinds of MUSIC! If your narrow minded Its a complete turn off! I love someone who takes the time to know what gets to my heart. So hears a cheat sheet! I LOVE holidays, the warmth and preparation. Everything about em'! I'm like a big kid. Early phone calls in the morning and sharing your love with the ones in your life, on these specials days mean soo much to me. I started Christmas shopping in October, it's not a game. I LOVE presents! an the thought behind giving someone something I knew they wanted. I LOVE Surprises!!! I love a man that knows me enough to just know how to TREAT ME! Why argue over dumb shyt, you know I don't like? If your gonna be late then, JUST CALL ME! If you see I called you an you can't talk, Just texted me an LET ME KNOW what's going on! Takes two seconds! I love all the small things, we don't have to go out. If I adore You I just want to be around you. I Love flowers and CHOCOLATE! Not an expensive fancy mixed box of em', a simple bag of Hershey kisses is Perfect! I LOVE Hugs and Kisses and Massages! I Love a man who can make a woman feel like a WOMAN!

Recently two different people, wrote me two different poems which was SOO sweet! Here they are!

Poem 1

You are a precious commodity taken advantage of/ even when your beauty rivals a dove/ As a man, trying to claim his throne, your patience is the virtue that is shown/ the closest thing to perfection I have seen thus far/ I see the potential in you queen, you are a star/ Man made from the dust of the earth, woman comes from his rib, so as an equal, we need women like you to live.../ I say all this to say to you... your a queen, and continue to do the things you do...

Poem 2 (Picture Perfect)

... She’s like a glare in the sun;
Designer eye wear and her hairstyle’s fun.
Camera phones flash from behind...their luck;
But I can just imagine what’s there from the front...

YUP!....Dammit the girl’s baad.
Picture perfect and she got her a calendar girl swaag.
Probably oiled up, body void of all ash;
She looks like she took a long caramel bath.

And like she got a pair of speakers for an ass;
You can tell she don’t own a pair of sneakers by her calves.
Come correct; better speak to her with class- she got sass;
You can tell by the way she holds her bag.

Work on your act, dude; show her you a man;
Or the tone she will give to you’s “I’m grown”, to belittle you.
Picture perfect from her face to her curves,
And something bout this picture’s worth a plethora of words.


She got it figured, got niggaz in the bag;
Got niggaz by her swag, got niggaz bout to snaaap;
ASAP; like a camera’s in hand;
Niggaz flash what they got, like she give a got-daaamn.

Some put that, “Are you an artist at all?” in her head;
Like “You already star in my head” (LAME)
Wrap her head up like she going to her bed…
Then wonder why all this is going to her head; she on

Cloud nine; Mary Jane, high
No make up. Mary J. Blige- just fine...
Niggaz shadowing her with their mouth wide
But she's more interested in her silhouettes outline.

When geek niggaz rap to her, it’s about time;
Till a street nigga swag on her; it’s about time.
Cell phones flip, call when you got time,
And her whole tone switch like she talking to her mom...


Picture Perfect

Love is Patient, Love is Kind, Love will make you lose you Mind!

Does today's black boys, past the test when it comes to Love and Respect?
Do they take pride in being immature, unapologetic, egotistical, selfish and hurtful???
Most women today would say YES! Why is that!?!?! In an age we've come so far, many have lost their moral compass and what seems to be their heart, in this common age. Chivalry is DEAD! Done, Fin-e-to, Ca-put!!! Thank goodness no one can read hear my thoughts, for most boys would get there feelings hurt. I doubt most women planned to fall in Love with mediocrity. Yet, were served a handful daily. It seems that in this age, boys seek out this ignorance, this way of living as a patch of acceptance from each other. If your sweet, kindhearted, thoughtful, faithful and respectful. They depict, manipulate and bash you, in a way hurtful to your self esteem. He's soft, open, and gay, are terms often used to describe such a man. An I say man, for he is a man who isn't weak hearted and easily influenced or motivated by ones approval.

I say this because, more then none, nowadays, artist are compelled reveal their disdain for it. Ciara, and her "Like a boy" song.

[Hook]
"Wish we could switch up the roles
And I could be that...
Tell you I love you
But when you call I never get back
Would you ask them questions like me?...
Like where you be at?
Cause I'm out 4 in the morning
On the corna rolling
Doing my own thing
Ohh

[Chorus]
What if I?...
Had a thing on the side?
Made ya cry?
Would the rules change up?...
Or would they still apply?...
If I played you like a toy?...
Sometimes I wish I did act like a boy"

Or Beyonce' s "If I were a boy" song, recently released.

"If I were a boy
I could turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleeping alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

(Chorus)

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand...

You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts...

Cause you’ve taken her for granted..."

Both songs, aside a numerous ones prior, all received worldly success. For the simple reason all women if not most, could relate and sympathized greatly. One big common factor in both songs, that's relevant is the term "Boy". For we hope there is a difference from such, and a Man. A man, strong and powerful, he would build up a woman instead or breaking her down. He takes pride in a woman, recognizes there beauty and makes her feel special and beautiful. Nor does he seek any approval from another or have false intentions.

It would be nice, if women could receive half of what we put out. It would be nice if we could fully trust, an not feel naive if we fall in love or compelled to ask questions. It would be nice just to simply have a Good person, a Real Black Man instead of these boys around! Is something too many women say now, more to often.

Wouldn't it be Nice!?!