Don't Deny Thy Husband

I don't know if Tori Spelling's wedding scandal has come across your screen ..but it's laughable.
Cheating in unacceptable on all fronts. I understand, but be honest with yourself. Some women push men into cheating. Being that they're too weak to leave. Sex, once every two weeks? REALLY? ..and neither one of you are 50? Someone's full of complete shit here.

We choose our mates. This isn't the olden ages where we're forced into marriage, or sold. You chose him. Now you don't want to touch him. Sparing 45 minutes is too much. These are the same people that will stick to diets they hate. Same people that will FIND TIME for the gym. But got forbid you could spare a little time to please your spouse? That's the inconvenience? Sex feels good for both parties, mind you. People dedicated all this time to other things constantly. Just for to appear the way they want. But asking to do something you should want to do for someone you love?

I don't feel sorry for you. You're full of shit and you know it. If you're too busy for fulfill your spouse? ..you better be too busy for everything. I mean it. Better not do a squat or count your calories. You're selfish. Sex isn't a four long hours. You can buss it out and get it out the way. You just chose not to. Which is fine. Just don't be mad when someone else chosen to fulfill them.

Ereka

There's nothing like that "I'm on my way" text. When you're feeling beat up from an workout.
My aid.
My lover.
My Masseuse.

Sometimes I reflect on people I've dated. I use to wonder "What if" a lot. I was a runaway girlfriend for awhile. The minute it got too close, I'd panic an cut them off. Deflect, or say no. I would wonder if I was ruining my future, by blowing off some worthy mates. Setting myself up for karma, the day I would finally be ready. Or flat-out just insane.

Every woman I saw, needed to be validated through a "relationship". Nothing solidified "worthy" like a counterpart. An when I look at the 25yr old me, it's like Whew. I'm so happy I didn't just ride a wave for stability. I was a baby then. Why the hell are so many women dying to commit to forever, when they're unsure of their today's? I would've been married with children and seemingly happy. While drowning in complacent insecurities. Trying to BE for someone else. Learn yourself first.

Everyone loves to latch on to the idea of love, instead of the idea of self. Love can only thrive in love. Not doubt or fear. If you're not secure with yourself ..you can't build something worth sustaining, with anybody. It's nearly impossible. I hate when I see loose, needy women, conforming to any and all ideals of our new world. Like puppets. Let me talk about dick, so he can want to know me. Let me obsess and talk about my ass all day, so he wants to f***. Then he tells you what you want to hear, for a month. You're smitten, fucked and still lonely in two months. I've seen that happen like a revolving door for some.

Or the "Ereka!" blend. That "Ah-ha" Draya moment, where they're like "Oh, I wear panties now" so I'm a lady. How's a man going to love you, when you don't even know yourself? Last week it was a selfie a day, for each body part. Now it's you in front of a stove. You never cooked before last week? Who are you? What do you like to do? By YOURSELF? What are you willing to pay for, that doesn't constitute a man's aid. He shouldn't pay for your happiness. How do you as a woman not know who you are or how to carry yourself without a man? A man shouldn't make you want to cook. What? You was never hungry? I don't get it. He shouldn't tell you how to be a lady. You're a damn woman. Where was your desire before? You can't seek your whole life to be lead. That's flawed, isn't it?

I Woke Up

Woke up and exercised this morning. All week actually. I'll get over the hump and love this one day ..but until then.

I woke up and exercised this morning.

Blasting Kanye's "I Wonder" because it never gets old. It's always the right time.

Seven o'clock, that's prime time
Heaven'll watch, God callin' from the hotlines
Why He keep givin' me hotlines?
I'm a star, how could I not shine?

How many ladies in the house?
How many ladies in the house without a spouse?
Somethin' in your blouse got me feelin' so aroused

What you about on that independent shit
Trade it all for a husband and some kids
You ever wonder what it all really mean
You wonder if you'll ever find your dreams

Little Joys

So it's Monday, on this second week in April. My smile's flourishing.

It's been a long weekend full of my favorites. I decided to hit up my favorite park Saturday morning. It's becoming more popular amongst the locals. The old me would find some annoyance in that but it's a bit sweet. Sharing what you love w/ those who love it, is love. After, I decided to see my godson an bestie. My godson's so well mannered and handsome. He's ADORABLE.

In the process, I ended up being finagled into going to Baltimore. Had to go see my boo Christina. Come to find out, someone lives right across from the Oriole's stadium. Soo much fun will be had this summer. Ridiculous. In the middle of our vices we decide to watch Grey's Anatomy. The first three episodes of the first three season's. Which I've never seen. Complete best idea EVER. So many epic moments caught in all three episodes. Which in turn became the foundation of the series and where it is today. It was everything. Some nights-in with your girls, can be better than any night out.

Sunday, was a race around the city. I just wanted a mimosa. He wanted a half smoke. The struggle began. We hit up three spots before the compromise.

I also sought out the original recording of  "Can't Help Falling in Love"  Which oddly enough was by Elvis Presley. I was honestly shocked. Wouldn't of pegged him for it. So as of  April 4th, 2014 I have Elvis in the rotation. I want the vinyl. I got plans for it.