Monday, November 16, 2009

Relationship Mental Abuse ...Are you Familiar?

All is fair in love an war, but in the words of
Rhianna "Fuck Love"
and
Tina Tuner "What's Love got to do with it?"


You may say that they have good reason to feel like that. But abuse is ABUSE! Scars can heal but emotional wounds often never do. Mental abuse is more common in everyday relationships, because it isn't as easy to detect. It can go on daily for years, with detrimental effects. On how you view yourself and treat others. Often leads to depression, drug dependency and suicide. If you verbally and mentally abuse some one for a long period of time, should you expect a peaceful resolve? No! Eventually someone Snaps an the outcome's bleak.

Some ask the question, how much can he/she take? While others pose this question... How could you treat the person you love that way? How could you treat Anyone you cared for that way? I call it the property syndrome. "Its MINE an I can do whatever I like with it, so mind your Business!" Is often the way most abusive relationships work. The object of being "MINE" is your partner i.e your property. You can kick it, break it, do whatever you like because it's yours and no others. It will always be there, because it's YOUR property. In a sense how some people can Use, Mistreat, Manipulate, Disrespect with no regards to their mate, and expect them to remain loyal.

You have one person genuinely loving, caring and seeking to build with their partner. While the other seeking to control and demean them. Nothing nor that person is ever good enough. Even if they've never had better. That person is expected to be there always, while the other should be fortunate to find time. There often isn't a middle ground. One person's seeking to please while the others often "BARKING". An insult or indirect action can feel like a assault, a punch. Like physical abuse with the mental, the person's usually only nice AFTER they've wronged. Showing some form of repent, in a way signaling they care. Often put down on what you Can't do. What you shouldn't of done. Of what he/she could do, but so help you god if you ever followed suit. Affecting every 3/5 Americans, often leading to most single parent homes.

A lot of these relationships can get volatile after awhile. There's but soo much a person can take from the one they love. When you trust someone enough to hand them your heart, the worst betrayal is the misuse of it. You lie on the behalf of them. Your embarrassed to say all that you truly endured with that person. Ashamed that you loved and did anything for that person, while they acted the way they did. Denying to you friends and most importantly your family about this person, they thought else wise of. Carrying a burden of hate an animosity because there's no one to talk to. Being a good person often means swallowing the hardest pill.

Some people never leave that situation in time, to learn from it. It may change them into they person who created them. Passing that hate and misuse of love to their children, family and friends. Falling into a deep depression, running aimlessly seeking love and attention. Everyone knows how to Dr. a relationship from the sidelines, but its different on the field. Be Careful!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I totally agree. But the way you describe the abuser sounds like a sociopath and may need help himself. The victim as well.