Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Love is Patient, Love is Kind, Love will make you lose you Mind!

Does today's black boys, past the test when it comes to Love and Respect?
Do they take pride in being immature, unapologetic, egotistical, selfish and hurtful???
Most women today would say YES! Why is that!?!?! In an age we've come so far, many have lost their moral compass and what seems to be their heart, in this common age. Chivalry is DEAD! Done, Fin-e-to, Ca-put!!! Thank goodness no one can read hear my thoughts, for most boys would get there feelings hurt. I doubt most women planned to fall in Love with mediocrity. Yet, were served a handful daily. It seems that in this age, boys seek out this ignorance, this way of living as a patch of acceptance from each other. If your sweet, kindhearted, thoughtful, faithful and respectful. They depict, manipulate and bash you, in a way hurtful to your self esteem. He's soft, open, and gay, are terms often used to describe such a man. An I say man, for he is a man who isn't weak hearted and easily influenced or motivated by ones approval.

I say this because, more then none, nowadays, artist are compelled reveal their disdain for it. Ciara, and her "Like a boy" song.

"Wish we could switch up the roles
And I could be that...
Tell you I love you
But when you call I never get back
Would you ask them questions like me?...
Like where you be at?
Cause I'm out 4 in the morning
On the corna rolling
Doing my own thing

What if I?...
Had a thing on the side?
Made ya cry?
Would the rules change up?...
Or would they still apply?...
If I played you like a toy?...
Sometimes I wish I did act like a boy"

Or Beyonce' s "If I were a boy" song, recently released.

"If I were a boy
I could turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleeping alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)


But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand...

You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts...

Cause you’ve taken her for granted..."

Both songs, aside a numerous ones prior, all received worldly success. For the simple reason all women if not most, could relate and sympathized greatly. One big common factor in both songs, that's relevant is the term "Boy". For we hope there is a difference from such, and a Man. A man, strong and powerful, he would build up a woman instead or breaking her down. He takes pride in a woman, recognizes there beauty and makes her feel special and beautiful. Nor does he seek any approval from another or have false intentions.

It would be nice, if women could receive half of what we put out. It would be nice if we could fully trust, an not feel naive if we fall in love or compelled to ask questions. It would be nice just to simply have a Good person, a Real Black Man instead of these boys around! Is something too many women say now, more to often.

Wouldn't it be Nice!?!


mangorene said...

hmm...i understand where you're coming from but this exactly why both ciara and beyonce used the term 'boys' instead of 'men' in their songs. and it annoys me when women have great men in front of them and refer to them as boys. REAL MEN DO EXIST! REAL MEN AREN'T FOR THE BS! REAL MEN DON'T PLAY THESE GAMES THAT little boys PLAY! lol...great post girl!

Ms.Lady Jai said...

i think this is a great post. my friends and i talk about this often. but i do know there are some nice guys out there, but it can be hard (or so i'm told) because often they are told by women that they "too nice" or they want a man with a harder demeanor. and then i know of guys who say they want a nice woman but rather have the girl that mistreats them.

Alicia said...


Neesh said...

Girl, I soo feel where you're coming from, and I love song's like Ciara's and Beyonce's because the unfortunate truth of the matter is that these guys will never truly understand what they put us through. These types of songs bring them as close as they're ever gonna come!
Your blog is poppin', I love it!
Check me out at www.NeeshOlogy.blogspot.com! Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

Everyone has a choice in life about everything! When it comes to relationships you have a choice to actually get to know someone before you get involved with them, you have a choice to stay involved with them once you actually find out who they are etc...

Maya Angelou said, "When someone tells you who they are, BELIEVE THEM!"

People tell you who they are all the time, even if they do not say those exact words to you and that is why you need to TRULY get to know someone before you get intimate with them.

First, you have to OVERstand that NO ONE! you date is going to be perfect, everyone you date is going to have some negative characteristic you do not like, this is your first choice to make! You have to ask yourself, Can I be with this person even if the things I do not like about them might not ever change!?

Then, you have to look at yourself in the mirror, women are always stating, whining, and crying about this man did this and that man did that to them, but they never look inward to see why it is they ALLOWED, yes ALLOWED! what happened to them. A person can only treat you in the manner of which you accept the treatment from them.

If your man degrades you and you allow it to happen he will continue to do it, all that is is being human! We all have flaws otherwise Christ would not have had to die for our sins.

You are no goo to anyone in a relationship if you are no good to yourself. If you feel that you continuously keep meeting dudes that are not doing you right, then I am sorry you have to wake up and accept the truth that there is something about yourself you need to handle and get straight before you can find the relationship you feel comfortable in!

No more blaming men for ruining your relationships the man you date is the same person 2 years from the time you first met him! It is just a choice of whether you accept that you may have made a bad choice or not!

Knowitall said...

I personally feel that in relationships we have to ask ourselves what's more important someone we want or someone we need???? I personally as a young lady use to love to date thugs(yes thugs thank god I grew of that)And even though those were the type of men I wanted in my life they were not the men I needed. I need someone that will treat the way I need to be treated and someone who understands the person I really am and I in turn will do the same for them. I totally understand I am not perfect and there are things a man will have to overlook about me so if I can find a man that maybe lacking in some areas but overcompensate in others and treats me well then I will be fine!!!! We as woman need to stop trying to make a man what we want he to be and leave him be if he can't be what it is we need him to be on his own.(In others don't overlook his evil act because he pays your phone bill and don't try to coach him out of his ignorant ways)Find a man that is good for you and most importantly good to you!!!!! Never settle for less because you get less than what you settled for

Faviola said...

This issue is one that will always grab attention but read before you post. It just states the obvious reasons why women can relate to the songs. I have a good man in my life, as some women can claim. That's why I clearly stated the difference from a "MAN" and "BOY".

P.s Love your comments and support!

Knowitall said...


Boooogie. said...

this is very well put i wrote on this subject as well... heres a link if you wanna check out my point of view... http://boooogie.blogspot.com/2008/09/some-real-shit.html